The first 5 wishes of a man in a couple
If you ask a man what he wants from his relationship, he will probably say something vague like: "it should be good, so it won't be bad". But the truth is that men also have clearly defined desires, even if they don't always express them directly. Let's decipher them together!
1. Respect - more valuable than declarations of love
Men value respect enormously. If they feel that they are valued for who they are and what they do, the relationship will flourish. Instead, constant criticism and undermining of their decisions can lead to tensions. According to a study conducted by the Gottman Institute, men in relationships where they feel respected have a 60% higher marital satisfaction rate than those who feel the lack of it (Gottman, 2017).
2. Personal space - it's not about you, it's about him
No, it doesn't mean that he wants to run away from the relationship, just to have time for his passions. A hobby, an evening with friends or simply a mental break helps him to be more present and involved in the relationship. Studies show that individuals who maintain a balance between time spent as a couple and individual activities are happier and less prone to conflict (Perel, 2019).
3. Physical affection - beyond the bedroom
Men are not only rational beings, but also emotional ones. A hug, a light touch on the shoulder or a simple "I'm glad you're here" can mean a lot to them. Research shows that physical touch triggers the release of oxytocin, the attachment hormone, which strengthens emotional connections (Feldman et al., 2010).
4. Emotional safety - yes, yes....and men need that!
A man opens up in a relationship only when he feels emotionally secure. If he feels that he can talk about his fears or vulnerabilities without being judged, the relationship will strengthen. According to a study by the APA (American Psychological Association), relationships based on emotional safety have a longer duration and increased satisfaction (APA, 2021).
5. Real partnership - the relationship is a team
To be a support in difficult moments, to encourage him in his plans, to enjoy successes together - all this matters enormously. No one wants to feel alone in a relationship. According to a longitudinal study conducted by the Harvard Study of Adult Development, relationships based on mutual support are the key to a happy life (Waldinger & Schulz, 2015).
And now?
Please reflect on how you can integrate these desires into your relationship.
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